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The Completely True People's History Of The World

from Teramerican by Teramerican

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lyrics

6 thousand years ago God said
let there be light
before that it sucked
because there was only night

God was on a role so he
created man from dust
man was lonely so the creation
of woman was a must

God made adam and eve
he didn't make adam and steve

They had a boy named Cain
must have had some sisters, killed his brother
to populate the earth,
he had his sisters and i guess his mother

next God made dinosaurs
something Noah could not afford
for his ark, they were too enormous
God said fuck you tyrannosaurus

fuck you tyrannosaurus

God has a plan and it
does not involve dinosaurs
are they really needed here today?
no way!
God says
to be fruitful and multiply
so dinosaurs cannot be here
because they'd eat us then we'd die

when Jesus comes back
he won't be riding a dinosaur
although that would be really cute
it's not a goal for which we should shoot

but there is one great goal
we could easily achieve
that goal is '10 in 2010'
if Jesus doesn't come back by then

if Jesus doesn't come back by then

6 thousand years and only
6.6 billion people
is that enough people here today?
no way!
we need to catch up with China
ladies, open your vaginas
it's our duty, there ain't no maybe
don't be fruity, make some babies

6 thousand years and only
6.6 billion people
is that enough people here today?
no way!
when Jesus comes back
we need people to watch his back
he's got a lot of enemies
none of which are you or me

God hates dinosaurs

credits

from Teramerican, released September 11, 2007

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Teramerican Washington, D.C.

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